7 Snorkeling Mistakes That Make You Look Like a Butt

Everybody's first snorkel session is a little tragic. Mine involved a family of tourists, one flooded mask, and a noise I have never made before or since. The good news: nearly every beginner snorkeling mistake is fixable in about ten seconds — once someone tells you the trick. So here are the seven that get everyone, plus the real fix for each.

1. The mask parked on the forehead

The classic. You surface, push the mask up onto your forehead, and now you look exactly like a person who has given up. Among divers, a mask on the forehead is universal body language for "I am panicking." The fix: if you need a break, push the mask down around your neck instead, or leave it on your face and just lift your head. A forehead mask also catches the first wave and slides straight into the sea. Ask me how I know.

2. Strapping the mask on like a bike helmet

A mask does not seal because it's tight. It seals because of suction. Over-tighten the strap and you actually pull the skirt away from your face, breaking the seal and leaving a red dent on your skull for the rest of the day. The fix: position the mask, breathe in gently through your nose, and let the suction hold it. Then tighten the strap only until it stops sliding. Snug, not surgical.

3. Breathing like you're being chased

New snorkelers breathe fast, shallow, and loud — which burns energy, fogs the mask, and makes you feel out of breath while you're literally floating and doing nothing. The fix: slow, deep, deliberate breaths. In through the mouth, all the way out. The snorkel has more dead-air space than your nose, so long exhales matter. Calm breathing is 90% of looking like you know what you're doing. The other 10% is the merch.

4. Skipping the defog

A brand-new mask has a thin factory film on the lens, and your warm face against cool water fogs it instantly. Then you're swimming blind and calling it "murky water." It is not murky. It is you. The fix: before you get in, rub a drop of defog gel (or a smear of baby shampoo, or — Brad's method — actual spit) around the dry inside of the lens, then do one quick rinse. Do it while the lens is dry or it won't stick.

5. The wrong fins for the job

Beginners grab either giant free-diving fins that cramp your calves in five minutes, or floppy pool fins that do nothing. The fix: for casual snorkeling you want medium-length, moderately-stiff fins that fit snug without pinching your toes. Kick from the hip with a slow, wide flutter — not a frantic bicycle from the knee. If your fins are launching you forward and you're still gasping, you're kicking wrong, not swimming hard.

6. Forgetting reef-safe sunscreen

Floating face-down for an hour means the backs of your legs and your whole spine are pointed straight at the sun. People come back from snorkeling with a burn shaped exactly like regret. Worse, ordinary sunscreen chemicals (oxybenzone, octinoxate) bleach coral. The fix: mineral, reef-safe sunscreen 20 minutes before you get in — or better, a rashguard-style shirt so you cover up and skip half the reapplication. A hat like The Trucker handles the walk to the water.

7. Panicking (the big one)

The mask floods a little, you swallow a mouthful of salt water, and your brain decides you are drowning in four feet of calm lagoon. The fix: stop and stand up if you can, or roll onto your back and float — you cannot sink in salt water while your lungs are full. Clear the mask, clear the snorkel, breathe. Panic is the only snorkeling mistake that's actually dangerous; everything else is just funny. Ready to fully commit to the bit? Grab the gear from the collection and dive in cheeks-first.